Dear Diary June 13, 2018: Star Signs

Dear Diary.

My mom told me the other day that the current star signs might be reason for a lot of the negative things that have happened recently.

Some examples include my dad getting a swollen eye yesterday after his basketball game, my little cousin running away and somehow using his super sharp memory to navigate through the roads to get to a city he visited before, my grandma and her(I’m assuming) allergic reaction, the passing away of a family member, and many other things that I probably should not talk about.

I was a little surprised that she took the stars as an explanation, but there just seemed to be no other ones. How can something so far away have an impact on us here?

It was imply a kind of interconnection or interrelationship between everything in the universe. Like we all contain some sort of nebulous power that runs through and in everything around us too.

I’m not sure I would’ve accepted that as a truth a few years ago. It makes me wonder about the connection between how we think and what is actually real.

Like…. Do we try to build a universe in our thoughts instead of going by what is actually there? And when we start thinking really hard, why we can’t we find “a universal reality”?

Perhaps there are some things that we know but not through thinking with our brain. Something innate… ooohhhhhhhhhhhh

I noticed I’ve been both very emotional and unemotional recently. Like…. I have been very worried for both my piano students to do well on their exams. They have both been procrastinating a lot and I just think I’ve been a terrible teacher all this time.

WHY AM I SUCH A LET-DOWN SOMETIMES?!??!?!

Anyways, I’ve been procrastinating and spending money way more recently. I bought chocolate from Purdy’s a few days ago, a large fries from this fast food place, and I’ve been having a real craving for a haircut.

Short hair is a pain in the neck sometimes… but I don’t have the commitment to grow it out.

I’m also not too sure if it really suits me in terms of looks, like maybe I looked better with longer hair. I do think, however, that short hair gives me a boost in creativity. Whenever I get a haircut I get to try something new, because no two haircuts are exactly alike. On top of that, my dad bought a pair of clippers and I have been secretly hoping to someday try it out.

In regards to university and things like that since I probably am going to have to start my applications this summer, I am VERY UNCERTAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don’t know if I’m going to be good enough for anything and I don’t even really know which universities I would even want to go to. There is also the added stress of facing the rejection of schools and not being the student the school wants me to be.

I don’t think I’m too stressed now, but I also think that I’m sitting on the tip on the side of a volcano, with the risk of falling into the volcano at anytime of getting blown up by a possible reaction. I don’t recall why I am sitting here, but like the view doesn’t bother me and I’ve made friends with a couple of pterodactyls that come visit me every so often.

There are people below who are trying to get me to climb down, but it’s unclear how I will be able to do that because I’m not wearing very good shoes and I’m not extremely athletic either.

That’s why I’m still up there. With a computer which I’m using to write this blog post.

I got it from the future.

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